Teacher & Student
by JaninaM8
Summary: The three times Jane attempted to teach Loki something, and the one time he taught her.


**A birthday present for my friend, Imogen74, whose birthday is on Saturday. Happy Birthday, my friend! :) **

**Pets**

Jane entered the trailer with a smile on her face. Loki stood there, beaming at her as though he'd been waiting for her. "Hello, my Jane," he greeted her.

She ignored the "my" in front of her name. He'd been doing that a lot lately along with whipping out a few endearments, too. It was a little disconcerting.

When Thor had asked her if she'd give his brother refuge because he'd done something to piss Odin off _again_, she had agreed. Her relationship with Thor had fizzled out, but they had remained friends and she had become his liaison of sorts to Midgard. And now she was Loki's baby-sitter.

She didn't mind the Trickster God _too _much. He could actually be a lot of fun. She actually found herself looking forward to seeing him after work every day.

"I got a pet," he told her happily.

Her smile faltered, thinking of a cat or dog that could potentially mess in the trailer. It wasn't an ideal place to have a pet, small as it was.

"Um, what kind of pet?" she asked.

"A snake."

Okay, snakes were gross. But as long as it was in a cage, she could deal.

"You're not pleased," he said with a frown.

"Well, I'm not a huge fan, but it's not like I'll be taking care of it and as long as it's in a cage somewhere where I don't always have to see it—"

"Cage?" He looked confused.

Jane was worried. "You did get a cage for—" It occurred to Jane that perhaps Loki didn't actually go to a pet store. He could have just plucked any snake out of the desert and brought it home. Her eyes darted nervously around the room and she resisted the urge to climb up on a chair. She changed directions. "Okay, let's start with where you got the snake. Let's start there."

His brow furrowed. "Well, where does one usually get pets? Outside."

And then she heard the unmistakable sound of a rattle. As in _rattlesnake_.

"Yeah, so we're not going to keep that snake," Jane said as she did in fact, very calmly climb onto the nearest table.

"Jane, what are you doing?"

"I'm climbing to my safety."

"Why?"

"Because I just heard the sound of a rattlesnake which means the snake you helped yourself to in the desert is poisonous. I'm not getting bit and going to the hospital because you decided you were bored and needed a pet."

Loki frowned. "I see. So the rattlesnake is poisonous to humans."

"Yes."

"And I should not have picked it up."

"That's right."

"Then where should I have gotten a pet?"

"I'm sure there are non-venomous snakes at the pet store. Where it can be kept in a cage and far away from me, okay?"

"You don't like snakes."

"Not at all."

"I see. But you'll still allow me to have one?"

She nodded. "As long as it's in a cage and you take care of it."

He frowned. "Very well then. I'll just get rid of the snake we have."

"Please do." And with the snap of his fingers the rattlesnake was gone; no doubt somewhere back where it belonged. With another snap of his fingers, there was another snake. In a cage this time.

She rubbed her forehead. "Loki, did you just nab a snake from the pet store with your magic?"

"Yes. Why?"

She sighed. "Okay. Now that you know how to use a toaster properly after causing three of them to go up in flames, it's time to teach you about paying for the things we want. It's called shopping."

"Why shop when you can just make things materialize? Or, rather, I can."

"Because that's not how humans do things, Loki, and you need to learn how to do things like a mortal so that SHIELD doesn't come after you, all right?"

He sighed heavily, as though it was a chore. "All right."

**Grocery shopping**

"I don't like these lights. They're too bright. And what in the name of Valhalla is that sound?"

"Muzack."

"It's terrible."

Jane sighed. "I know. It's a difficult cross we all have to bear when we come to restock our pantries."

Someone knocked into their cart and Loki glared so hard at the woman that did that she practically ran down the aisle away from them.

Jane sighed again. "Loki, don't glare at people like that."

"She knocked into our cart."

"It was an accident."

"She should watch where she's going."

"Trust me; she will be from now on. Now behave yourself, Menace."

"Did you just call me a menace?"

"I sure did. Now grab that box of Pop Tarts for me on the top shelf, please. The one that says 'S'mores'."

"No."

She looked at him. "What?"

"I said no. I don't like Pop Tarts."

"You don't have to eat them."

"I don't think you should eat anything that tastes like cardboard, love."

Jane shook her head in annoyance. "Why do people say that? Have you actually ever eaten cardboard?"

"No, I don't even know what cardboard is, but I heard Darcy say it was bad for you."

"Of course she did. And yet she helps herself to my stash whenever possible."

"Well, yes, I did find it odd that she was saying that with such disgust while cramming one in her mouth." He shrugged. "At least it shut her gob for a blessed thirty seconds."

Jane couldn't help but giggle. He smiled back at her and leaned in closer. "Loki," she said sweetly. "Will you please grab that box of Pop Tarts for me?"

He stared at her, his green eyes boring into her. They looked almost…heated. He then nodded and grabbed the box. He handed it to her and she smiled and kissed his cheek.

"And that," she said, "is how you ask for something want really nicely instead of demanding it." She dropped the box in the cart. "Look at that. Two lessons in one shot. Now maybe when you want another helping of dinner you'll ask nicely." She moved the cart forward, missing how Loki put his hand to his cheek as though to keep her kiss there on his skin for always.

**Driving**

The car lurched forward.

"The brake, step on the brake!" Jane exclaimed. She had thought teaching Loki to drive would be a help to her. She was seriously tired of driving him around when he decided he just needed to go somewhere.

She might have made a mistake. This might be the one thing she could not teach him. They'd been in the parking lot an hour and hadn't even managed to actually drive yet. Or turn on the car. She had a sneaking suspicion he was just being difficult on purpose.

"Which one is the brake again?" Loki asked.

"The one on your left, Loki. We went over this. Three times."

He looked down at the pedals with a frown.

"Don't take your eyes off the road!" she hollered at him. Yep, she was regretting this. He made her nervous and when she was nervous, she had a temper. Loki was always kind enough to point that out.

He looked at her now. "Jane, we're not on a road. You said this was a parking lot."

She gritted her teeth together. "That's not the point, Loki. You don't ever take your eyes off what is in front of you to look down." She put her hand on his face and turned it away from him and to the parking lot.

"What if I drop something?" he asked.

"You wait until you're stopped."

"What if the something I drop is hot or burning?"

She looked at him. "What the hell are you going to have in your hand that is _burning_?"

"One of those long things I see people sucking on."

"Cigarettes? No. You're not going to take up smoking."

"You know I hate it when you tell me not to do something. This is just like the snake incident all over again."

"Yeah, except not. I let you have one, didn't I?"

"But you won't let me take it out. Why do you humans insist on putting animals in cages?"

"Not all of them are put in cages."

"So some may roam free like that snake in the desert?"

"Loki, we can discuss animals later. _Will you press the fucking brake now before we hit that pole_?!"

He didn't press the brake though. He just turned the wheel, narrowly missing the wheel. Good Christ it was a good thing the parking lot was empty. She gave herself a mental pat on the back for using an abandoned parking lot in front of an abandoned store in which to teach Loki to drive.

"Can we talk about animals now?" he asked.

Jane slammed on the emergency brake and glared at him. She then put the car in park.

He just looked at her as though he had no idea why she was so angry.

"Get out, get out, get out!" she hollered at him and climbed out of the car.

He did so and looked at her quizzically as he made his way to the passenger side.

She got in the car, undid the emergency brake, put the car in drive and they were off. "You're not driving again."

Loki looked out the window and smiled. _Mission accomplished._

**Love**

Jane and Loki watched Thor return to Asgard in a flash of brilliant light and when he was gone and the wind had settled, Loki looked at Jane. "I'm not leaving."

She started. "What?"

"I'm not leaving tomorrow with him when he returns for me."

She blinked. "Why not?"

"Because I want to stay here with you."

She swallowed hard. "Excuse me?"

"I have a pet and a toaster and I have you. I see no reason to leave."

"Loki, you're living with me in a trailer. You come from a _palace_. I have heard you complain more than once about the size of the bathroom."

"You're missing what I'm saying."

"Then enlighten me."

He moved closer and she straightened when he placed a cool hand on the side of her warm cheek. "Jane, my Jane…You're right. I do have a palace. Rooms as large as this infernal town, and all the comforts I could ask for – I certainly do not have to make my own toast and no one drives or eats cardboard there."

"I don't eat—"

"But Asgard does not have you, my love. And you are vital to me."

And then he kissed her and Jane grabbed onto his shoulders because she wasn't sure she had knees anymore. He lifted her close against him, her feet leaving the ground which is how that kiss was making her feel: as though she was floating.

His strong body pressed against hers was delicious. It had been so long…she and Thor had never consummated their relationship. And before that, well, it was rather depressing to think about.

"We can change our habitat," he murmured against her lips. "But I will not find another you in Asgard and you will not find another me on Midgard."

"I don't think there's another you anywhere and thank God for that," she murmured back.

"I want to stay with you, Jane. I just want…you."

She nodded, wanting his lips on hers again. "Okay."

She didn't even complain when he used his magic to get them in the trailer. Or used it to get them naked.

"All this time I thought you were just tolerating me and this place until you could go home," she whispered when he covered her with his gloriously naked body.

"No, Jane. All this time I was falling in love with you."

Imagine that.

"May I stay here with you?" He slipped inside her, taking her breath away. "Please?"

She nodded. "Yes. And I might I say you really nailed how to ask for something nicely."


End file.
